IF YOU CAN'T BEAT THEM. JOIN THEM

 The poor old Catholic Church has been fighting a rearguard action for decades, trying to keep 'the faithful' under control and, in darkness blindly seeking guidance. 

This was OK in less 'enlightened times' but chalk this up to another success for modern communications and social media. No longer are the uneducated, dim or bewildered totally dependant on missives from the pulpit as they can simply do Google searches or rely on Facebook, X and other platforms to 'inform' them.

The consumers, sorry, the faithful are no longer satisfied with stories from old books and 'mysteries' hidden in tabernacles and monstrances - they want a bit of sparkle and pizazz which is why dreary old church calendar events like Christmas, Easter, All Saints Day, Advent, Epiphany, Lent, Ascension Day, Pentecost etc. are not popular compared to Santa's Christmas, The Easter Bunny's Easter and Halloween. Even old Robert, one of the Catholic Church's most devout followers admits that the old stuff is as stale as the Communion hosts on a Monday.

In a comment on a recent The Curmudgeon's post he said:

I particularly note his wanting All Saints Day (the day after Halloween) to be commercialised and having retail stores sell tacky Catholic junk like "... plastic halos, cotton wool clouds, automated St Benedict's that raise and lower rosary beads, strings of glowing solar powered rosary beads".

Well done that man even if the spelling is atrocious.

When I was very young, at Primary school at about 8 or 9 years old, I was an altar boy at St Anne's Parish Church. I used to enjoy dressing up in the vestments and assisting at Mass and Benediction. My favourite 'job' was swinging the thurible (censer).

I loved the smell of the incense and the fumes used to make me feel a bit spacey.

There's zero chance though, regardless of what Robert hopes for, that I'd rush into a store to buy some cheaply made synthetic altar boy vestments to dress up on All Saints Day.

That's just me though and, as Halloween, Guy Fawkes, Christmas, Easter, Chinese New Year, Diwali and other retailer coopted festivals show - there's no bottom limit to bad taste where the public is concerned and "plastic halos, cotton wool clouds, automated St Benedict's that raise and lower rosary beads, strings of glowing solar powered rosary beads" should race off the shelves (and be in the rubbish dump the week after).

Robert might have a bit of self interest in this as well as, in addition to being entrusted with the collection at Mass he is often in charge of the Church Shop. This Church Shop is certainly in need of a bit of pizazz ....

.... with its boring selection of holy cards, dreary pamphlets and crappy medals. Even Richard's suggestion of installing a condom machine wasn't adopted. I guess that Robert is embarrassed at the takings each Sunday and has to confess this on Monday each week. Imagine what the takings would be with a whole lot of new merchandise...