MARY MARY QUITE CONTRARY

We had a bit of a laugh, us Curmudgeons when we read a recent post of Robert's recounting his experience at Mass the other day when his new best friend Father Patrick banged on about the Virgin Mary.

Fr Patrick was the priest who said Mass. Of course it was the feast day of the Assumption of Mary to Heaven so praises and prayers to Mary abounded.



Father Patrick's homily was therefore about Mary and her role as someone who can show us how to live fully.

He said " ...she shows us why we were created and how to live fully, she shows us when we are most fully alive. Mary gave thanks and praise to God and served God and God's people. There is much you can do in life , much which is exciting and good. Very good. And can give great meaning indeed. But if we know that we are created to give thanks and praise to God, to serve God and to serve God's people, that gives greater meaning and a great truth to direct our lives and how to live fully and then we are most alive. Even on a Sunday morning when we might have been up early watching silly people throwing leather around in a field, we still know that we were created to give thanks and praise to God, to serve God and God's people . She realized that this was the mission of her life. This brought her fullness of life, when she gave thanks and praise to God, not only was she most alive but she brought life into the world. And yes, this is through her son, but in so many other ways.

Yes, she brought the light of Jesus into the world and she brought the light to the apostles...He has so many ways to bring life into the world.

Why were you created? Your answer to the question shapes your day.
With Mary we can bring Jesus into THIS time, a time when this world needs a message of hope and life and goodness.
And then with Mary we will be finally, one day, with God. Not something to be afraid of. For we know it is the fullness of life, Mary lived and died in thanks and praise to God in whose presence she knows fullness.
Where Mary goes we follow with thanks and praise through eternity."

What a hoot! I particularly liked that bit about Mary showing us that we are fully alive. That's helpful I guess if you wake up one morning and think that you're dead.

We also had a laugh when reading this article:

THE UNTOLD TRUTH OF MARY AND JOSEPH - GRUNGE

It's worth a read but here are some outtakes:

 A girl named Mary gets pregnant by the Holy Spirit, her fiance decides to be a solid dude and be God's kid's stepfather, she and Joseph go to another city to get counted in a census, there's no room at the inn, and she gives birth to the son of God (Jesus) in a stable surrounded by cute animals. Then three kings from far away, led by a giant star pointing out where Jesus is, show up with expensive gifts (followed by random shepherds with no gifts). Zoom out on a sweet scene of the holy family. They have to flee to Egypt to escape a murderous king later. But all is calm and all is bright for now.


THEY ALMOST BROKE UP BECAUSE MARY WAS PREGNANT

In Mary and Joseph's time, women's purity was valued as a currency, something that would sweeten the deal between marriage negotiations in family. There were no paternity tests back then—if you wanted kids that you were sure were yours, the best insurance was marrying a virgin. 
So imagine your girlfriend shows up after visiting her cousin for three months with a big ol' baby bump. Everyone, not just Joseph, was freaking out. Mary would have been considered damaged goods and not marriage material. It didn't help that she was claiming it was God's baby, not even that of a man other than Joseph. So he planned to end their engagement. 


WITHOUT JOSEPH, MARY WOULD HAVE BEEN STONED TO DEATH

Think about the story of the Nativity as if it happened today: Teenage girl from an extremely conservative society (when it comes to sex and women's rights) gets engaged, visits her cousin, and comes back visibly pregnant. Mary was an OG and kept to her story that the Holy Spirit had gotten her pregnant, but people were as skeptical of the idea back then as they would have been today.
Joseph tried to be nice about it—Matthew 1:19 describes how he planned to separate from her quietly so the public wouldn't shame her. But "shame her" is a nice way to say "stone her to death." Deuteronomy 22:21 and the surrounding verses lay down the law that if a girl had sex while living with her parents (i.e. unmarried), she would be stoned to death for bringing shame upon her family.

JOSEPH SAVED JESUS'S LIFE AS A BABY

Once the angel visited Joseph and confirmed that Mary was really going to have God's kid, Joseph got on board immediately.
But this also extended to after the birth of Jesus. God, perhaps impressed by how chill Joseph had been throughout this whole ordeal, sent another angel to Joseph telling him that they had to pick up and leave immediately. He obeyed, and they fled what turned out to be a massacre of all kids in Bethlehem younger than two years old. King Herod (a.k.a. one of the best Sunday School villains) had sent people out to kill any child who might be the Messiah after running into the three kings on their way to visit Jesus. Couldn't handle any competition for the throne, apparently.

MARY AND JOSEPH DIDN'T GET INTIMATE AT ALL UNTIL AFTER JESUS WAS BORN

It's explicitly stated in the Bible that Joseph and Mary didn't consummate their marriage until after Jesus was born and they bailed to Egypt. Which makes sense, since Mary was pregnant most of the time they were initially together. And getting freaky isn't really worth it if it means your girlfriend is stoned afterward.
But even this viewpoint is pretty revolutionary in terms of how believers view Mary. There's a healthy group of people, mostly Catholic, who believe that Mary never had sex ever. The "perpetual virgin" view of Mary is used as a way to honour her alleged holiness and purity as the mother of God.

There's more interesting stuff in the article so have a read.

One thing that particularly stands out for me though is the fact that if this was all planned by that God joker he/she/it knew what was going to happen step by step. He/she/it knew then that wicked old Herod, learning of the birth of an heir to a or the kingdom other than his own sprogs, would have every other baby born in the kingdom murdered. We assume that this would have numbered in the hundreds of thousands. What a bastard - God as well as Herod. If I did believe in Jesus (who apparently never existed) and Mary and God and stuff then this part of the story would leave a very bad taste in my mouth as they all would have been aware of the consequences.